The Fallout

Photo by Bgrace*

It was the end of 2008. Matt was reading a book called Cosmos and Psychology by Richard Tarnas. I think he bought it at the Library Book Sale. Every once in a while he would draw my attention to something he was reading. Mostly books like this are so outside of my sphere of understanding and interest that it’s a bit painful to give a good effort at listening. But something Matt read connected to some things I had been reading (posted Oct. 2008) so I paid attention.
The author was talking about Copernicus. Wikepedia explains that Copernicus is the man responsible for heliocentrism—the astronomical model in which the Earth and planets revolve around a stationary sun at the center of the universe. Copernicus published his theories on his deathbed. Thus he didn’t have to face most of the upheaval his theories against geocentrism (the earth at the center of the universe) brought about.
Galileo was one of his converts, but the Catholic Church condemned heliocentrism as false and contrary to Scripture. The Roman Inquisition tried and found Galileo “vehemently suspect of heresy” and forced Galileo to recant his support of it. He spent the rest of his life under house arrest.
The following is a long and tedious 2 page excerpt from Cosmos and Psyche. I thought about trying to condense and summarize it and felt I couldn’t do it justice—I’m not smart enough. (Have I ever mentioned how much I don’t like math and science?) But really, it is very insightful. So I’m going to post the excerpt and then try to explain why I connected so much with it.

“It was not primarily empirical considerations nor, in the narrow modern sense, “rational” factors that were decisive in persuading the early Copernican revolutionaries to pursue and elaborate the heliocentric hypothesis. These were necessary but not sufficient conditions for such a radical change. It was, above all, powerful spiritual and even aesthetic intellectual predispositions that made the crucial difference. And it was these predispositions…all supporting a mystical-mathematical cosmology that effectively transformed the significance of the rational and empirical factors.

…To adopt the Copernican idea in those first decades took above all an overriding passion for a certain kind of intellectual beauty and precision, a sensibility that so valued elegance, harmony, simplicity, and coherence as intrinsic qualities of the divine heavens that one would be willing to ignore both the evidence of the senses and the arguments from contemporary physics against the movement of the Earth, confident that in time adequate explanations could be found.

The first Copernicans had experienced a kind of inner conversion. Their epiphany was at once intellectual and spiritual, psychological and cosmological, and all their research and thinking served the new vision by which they were happily possessed. Their intuition ran ahead far in advance of all the theoretical and empirical work that had to be done before the new theory could be fully justified and grounded.

Tarnas quotes Galileo, “Nor can I have ever sufficiently admired the outstanding acumen of those who have taken hold of this opinion and accepted it as true: they have, through sheer force of intellect done such violence to their own senses as to prefer what reason told them over that which sensible experience showed them to be the contrary.”

For the Copernican hypothesis to be made reasonable, an entirely new conception of reason itself had to be forged: new ways of deciding what counts as truth, new ways of recognizing patterns, new forms of evidence, new categories of interpretation, a new understanding of causality. Long-established rules of scientific methodology had to be overturned. An entirely new epistemology (theory of knowledge) and ontology (theory of existence) had to be formulated. The nature of the Copernican revolution was so fundamental that what had to be rethought was not only all the conventional scientific theories but the entire established hierarchy of humanities place in the universal scheme of things: its relation to the rest of nature and to the cosmos, its relation to the divine, the basis for its morality, its capacity for certain knowledge, its historical self-understanding. Such a radical transformation could not happen overnight. For the cultural mind and psyche to support that transformation, the passage of entire generations was required, including the deaths of the many intellectual authorities who were incapable of escaping the hold of the reigning paradigm. The required change was not just physical but metaphysical: The entire world needed to be revisioned. In the end, the implications of the great shift—cosmological, religious, moral, epistemological, psychological, existential—were so far-reaching that it would take centuries to work them out, even to become conscious of them.

Gradually, the passage of time, and heroic efforts against powerful opponents and entrenched assumptions, brought about the complete triumph of the Copernican shift.”

OK, so if you are still with me, let me first clarify that I am not trying to say that I am some sort of genius that has come up with a new way of seeing the universe and am now trying to find some way of getting everyone to receive my enlightenment.
What I found incredibly helpful in these few paragraphs was the description of what happens when we have looked at the universe through a particular paradigm—and then that paradigm collapses. The author is so insightful about how something we may take for granted has so much influence on how we have constructed our world view. The fall out—if we care to notice and find cohesiveness and take stock of the implication--is inexplicably overwhelming. Yet, for these “believers” there was an intuition—a “knowing” you could say, that was more compelling than the evidence they had in hand. They possessed a faith that as they continued to study and learn, the evidence would eventually line up with their theories.
There was so much opposition to this heliocentric theory.  Theologians alone had great reason to reject it. If the sun did not revolve around the earth, than didn’t that imply that Joshua was erroneous when he said God made the sun stand still? This would require a faith that was able to understand the truth of Scripture in a new way. And let’s face it. Is it really necessary that we know that? I mean, how many Godly people of that day were able to fulfill their call to follow Jesus without knowing that the planets really revolved around the sun? If it were that important for us to know and understand, why didn’t God tell us…or Joshua for that matter?
Except that for some reason, God did, at that time, decide to use a few men to see the universe differently—in truth. Wouldn’t our world be different today in ways we cannot even fathom, had they not the courage to follow what they could see and not yet fully understand? But the violence they themselves had to do to their own minds, to see the possibilities in a different light were unimaginable. My guess is, in comparison, the violence done to them by others was probably near insignificant. But do I believe God gave them divine insight and strength and courage to do their work even if at times they questioned if they were losing their mind or even their own soul? Yes, I do.
Personally, Dad, this is what I feel I want to communicate to you from this about my journey:
I did not choose to destroy the paradigm through which I was raised to see the world and understand God. In that paradigm, I too would have believed that experiences like mine come from the imagination. When circumstances would occur that I could not explain, I would have reveled in the luxury of dismissal because finding coherence would not have been necessary for my survival. I believe God, not Satan, nor an overactive imagination was responsible for the demolition of my paradigm. I could give you story after story about why, but in the end belief requires so much more than circumstances.
What I did choose was to follow God down this path. I experienced an enormous amount of dissonance because at some level I understood it was a foundational change that would effect everything in my paradigm--how I perceived and interacted with God and His world, myself, my history and my future.  It was too much for me to process at once.  It was extraordinarily painful--actually I will use the term traumatic because I experienced text-book post traumatic syndrome.  I read somewhere that the trauma you experience is more intense depending on how closely it violates your most deeply held convictions.  You couldn't get any deeper than this--I felt like my God killed me (though I don't look at it exactly that way now) or that my God died.  And every time that my new attempts at understanding were called into question by the circumstances around me, the authorities over me, or my inability to defend myself I went through the trauma all over again--but worse because I didn't know how to believe I wasn't mistaken.  I didn't have any proof...only the same voice calling me to follow.
Why would God demolish my paradigm? I’m not sure I know the answer yet. But though there have been many times that I have doubted His goodness, I do believe He is truly good.
You may be right—you may not have needed the gifts of the Spirit (as I understand them) or foreknowledge or the ability to hear God speak words into your mind to do the will and work of God as He has revealed to you and called you. And the thought that keeps coming to me as I read your writings is that I’m not sure I would even want your paradigm to collapse as mine did. That is not a prayer I have or will at this point pray. I know what it cost me and honestly, I think it would cost you even more.
I do think that it would be helpful for you to understand the deepest source of my pain and I think this is a start.  I will explain further, as well as I can while still protecting what needs to be protected. A few months ago I wrote about Good Friday and wasn’t sure when the Lord would release me to post it. I think that now is time and I’ll try to put it up soon.
I hope this helps you to understand a bit more where I am coming from.
By the way—at the top of this post where Oct. 2008 is a different color—that is a link to an older post. If you click on it, it will take you there.  I found much comfort in those thoughts during that time in my life.
Love you,
B

*The picture at the top is one I took at Mt. St. Helens. 

 It is a type of flora that grows in the aftermath of a volcanic eruption. 

 It grows out of the ashes.  I keep this photo on my desk. 

Hearing God

Hello Becky,
I pulled Dallas Willard's book off my shelf again and started reading it again. The book Hearing God===Developing a conversational relationship with God. I then looked up in my old documents and found something I wrote to myself during a meditation a few years back. It was entitled Hearing God speak. I read it through a few times just to see if my thinking has changed on the subject since that time a few years ago. I can't say that my thinking on the matter has changed. And you are absolutely correct in what you said conserning "seeing things through the lens of the teachers we have studied under and the lens of our own experience". Two of the 5 greatest powers that mold us Becky (according to Tozer) are the people we keep company with and the books we read or the "voices" we listen to. Obviously you have kept company with many I have not kept company with and you are well read from authors I have never even heard of. You have also listened to many other people (voices) that I have never chosen to listen to or would have --had I the chance (probably). Is it any wonder that we don't see eye to eye on a lot of issues.
Well, we are in dialogue mode and I will sign off for the weekend. Love you. Can't wait to get through the winter here in south Brazil.
Dad
Attachment:
God leads us and directs our footsteps and we need to put ourselves into position to hear His voice. We need to converse with Him daily. We need to be in His Word and consider ourselves every bit as important as the men of faith in past generations. He still is about saving the lost. He is still using His host of angels to accomplish His purpose. He says to them “Move and do this or do that” and they accomplish His purposes. He speaks to us as well to speak on this or that subject, to do this or do that or not to do this or that. Sometimes He says to wait upon Him. Sometimes we want answers now but He is not about to let us in on what He is doing. We must learn patience and in the meantime just grow in our reliance upon His goodness and grace. He is perfect in all His ways. What am I to do today? Keep on fearing Him and loving Him and listening to Him and be ready to go and do whatever He commands. It will always be doable with His enabling.
What is hard right now is that we are under supported. That is what the print out says. Is that really the fact though. Is God ever under supporting His servants? Will He not supply us with all of our needs through other means? We may have to practice better economy. We may have to let our need known to others. We may have to just ask Him about these things and get His ok on letters to write or pastors to call . We do however need to recognize that in His good time He will supply no matter what. Why, because He has promised to meet our needs. If we need to go back home to raise funds then we can assume that He wants us away from the field for His reasons or wants us back in the states to accomplish something there or He is in the process of teaching us something we need growing in.
God is really not needing us to have any special gifts of miracles or languages or healing powers these days to get the attention of anyone. They all have His Word and if they don’t believe His Word then there is little hope for them any way. He can put within them this disposition to trust His Word. We as His children do need to shine as lights in our character before the world so as to be living proof of what God and His Word has produced and by His Spirit is continuing to produce. We are new creations and living proof that something good, supernatural, uplifting, liberating, free has happened to us. God wants to call others to His Word and to His Message through us His disciples. We are to be daily guided by Him and listening to Him and empowered by Him to accomplish what He has to be accomplished now on the road to bringing about His final purposes here on this earth. Does He have to give people the gift of seeing into the future today? I think not. Does He have to give people the gift of healing to accomplish His purposes in the world today? I think not. He does the healing according to His will and purposes. We just pray that His will is accomplished in the life of that person and believe in the future goodness and favor and grace of God. If He chooses not to heal then I must just leave it to His Sovereign will and be content in that. He will give me grace to even find contentment in the difficult things.
Am I content with the growth of our people out in Cai? Yes and No. I am thrilled with what He has already done but I believe He wants to do much more. I am convinced that He wants that work to grow even more and that He wants to use weak vessels like Dan and Diana Richner and Randy and Sarah Southwell to move that work towards independent status. This is our calling right now and when He calls us to move on then that calling will be rather clear. What about God speaking to me about Marcio? Did God have to give me a special revelation in this matter? No! I do believe that God could not have made it more clear to me that this was not the time for Marcio and Catia to be working with us at Cai. Could I have been mistaken? I believe not! Do I need some kind of confirmation in the future such as hearing that Marcio has strayed from the good path? No, I don’t need any such confirmation. What I need is to be in position to hear God speak. Being daily in His Word and walking in obedience to His Word and Having the right desires in my heart and walking in humility recognizing that this is His work and not mine, are all key to hearing God and being directed by Him. I believe that Marcio is far better where he is presently because it is where God has directed his steps and God has even used me to help him get there and at the same time protected this work from being harmed.
What do I want God to speak to me about in the near future? I guess it is just the daily things. I want Him to speak to me about how to best help others ---principally my family and our people at Cai. I want Him to guide me in what to share with our People. I want Him to guide me and us as to where we should expend our energies and giftedness. I want Him to guide and speak to Maicol, Lu, Douglas, Daniel and Rodrigo and all of our people associated with this ministry so that they too will be guided into useful service and bring God the Father, Son and Holy Spirit great glory. Without Him we will all fail. Without listening to His Voice we will be frustrated and fail. Today Father, I want to hear Your voice and be led by Your Spirit and know and do Your will and I have every confidence that You will give me the grace to be successful in hearing Your voice, doing Your will and being all that You want me to be. If I fail then Father it will be my fault. It will be because I am living according to my flesh and am about doing my thing and not yours. If this happens I will be disciplined of course by a loving Father who will help me to confess and repent of my sin. Hopefully that will not be necessary today.

Thoughts About the Butterflies...

The butterflies and Emily who was three then and what God was at that time trying to show you was that she would “fly again” has certainly come true. She is now about to turn 9 if I am not mistaken and what a beautiful little granddaughter she is. I can’t wait to see her in October and November. I just love the fall season in Pennsylvania. I think this year we will all need to visit the apple orchard and pick some of the juiciest apples


On planet earth. Becky, having read your blogs to this point I must admit that I have real reservations that we will be doing a lot of diologue. I am not a debater and I am not near as intelligent as you are nor your teachers. My only hope in all of this comes from what the Psalmist said in 119:99 “I have more insight than all my teachers, for I meditate on your statues.”

Here are some things that raised a flag in the butterfly story but one that is actually common to many people. You said that you “began to see certain things and had a strong sense they were forthcoming”. You had a sense that some difficulties lay ahead for Emily. So you did what we are all instructed to do from the “sacred scriptures”, we pray. I will never forget when I kissed your mom good by and boarded an airplane with the destination of Vietnam back in 1969. We had no children at that time. On the airplane I had a sense that something bad was forthcoming and after my first encounter with the enemy on LZ Ike only two weeks after landing there I believed I would actually die there. So, I prayed and others prayed and God was gracious and now I am going on 66 years of age and still have a sense that bad things could be forthcoming. That of course is not all bad. In a way, that is why we have our children taking part in Sunday School and learning God’s ways and learning about a God who loves us and knows how to protect us and meet all of our needs in a sick, evil, dangerous world and that we are at war.

When you said in your blog that you followed the Lord to a yard sale not knowing where or what would happen when you got there I can sort of relate to that as well. You are a chip off the old block. It seems that when I am stressed out about something, I often get the urge to just go garage shopping or yard sale shopping and it doesn’t really matter where I am heading but any sale will do. I am not so sure I could blame all those visits on the Lord however after all these years of ministry. We do have strong propensities and I do know that fathers pass most of the bad ones off to their children so you might want to give your dad credit for that one.

You ended that blog with a very interesting word and this is one that I believe our diologue might be dealing with. Hopefully, it will bear some fruit. Here are your words: “The idea of restoration through a butterfly”. Becky, Emily is flying like the butterflies and so too are Grace and Sarah. So too is your dad at 65. It is just that he is flying in “slow mo”. You do remember though a time when your dad was not flying high. It was a very painful time and I never suffered anything like it prior to or thank God afterwords. It was a school I would never want to return to. I can say as the Psalmist said, “Before I was afflicted I went astray but now I obey your word.” For me it was something quite common of those who are in the ministry or heading into or out of the ministry. It has put many a flying butterfly into a mode of needing restoration. I was so naïve about the effect bitterness can have on anyone and especially since I felt justified in my opinions. God was gracious to me and to our family and I am thankfully among the restored and hopefully God will use me to help many others to the same flying status.

The butterflies on the beach that were so beautiful yet damaged and died before their time instead of beautifying God’s created earth challenged you and I can relate to that as well. That is why your mom and I are still here in Brazil. That is what ministry is all about. God is not willing that any should perish. They don’t have to either. We don’t need to be so intelligent and try to figure it all out. We don’t need to know it “all”. We don’t even need a special calling! There are plenty of butterflies in every neighborhood all over the world and they need rescuers like you and like me.

Well, by now you know that once you give me an open door I usually go through and pay the price afterwards. Just try your best to be gracious to this “old man” and try to respect your elders and remember to be slow to speak, quick to hear and slow to be angry. I have tried to follow this rule and that is why I have been very slow to respond to the butterflies posts. I may take even longer to respond to the post on dreams.

I do love you and always will and can’t wait to fly some together in ministry like we used to at Edwardo Menezes hospital with the aids patients who were not flying well at the time.
Love you much.
Dad

Thoughts on Tozer

Hello Becky,
I have been up since 5:30 this morning and I am of a clear mind and already on my second cup of coffee. I do have a lot of thoughts flowing through my mind having been studying numerous passages of scripture and having read a lot of AW Tozer and also of John Piper.
You may remember that the late Dr. Kempton while president of ABWE sometime during the early 1990’s recommended to all his missionaries the books written by A.W. Tozer. Well, right now I have on my desk 8 of them. All in paper back and most of them well underlined. As you are well aware, Dr. Kempton was a very passionate servant of God and one who impacted many lives including my own. Someone once cornered me while in New Jersey and made this statement: “Dan, there is something I just don’t quite understand about you, and your family. Everyone seems to be so “passionate” in what they believe. He happened to be the leader of the young people at Southwood Baptist Church in New Jersey. Something of this passion may be inherited in some way. I will not go down that rabbit trail right now. However, I will say this about my dad, your grandfather. George Doty Richner was a very passionate man. He, along with your grandmother Cornelia, raised 10 children in Honesdale, Pennsylvania. I was told just recently by someone who knew my dad that George was always on a “mission”. He was passionate about getting out the gospel but not always in a “quiet way” at the Honesdale High School and that sometimes got him into trouble. I heard from someone that “our fathers” among other things, pass down to their children the “worst” of propensities. Not sure where I am going with that one so just relax.
In chapter 21 of AW Tozer’s book entitled Born after Midnight he writes a chapter entitled “Only a few things matter”. It is a must read. I highly recommend this chapter. I will quote just a few things he said. “What really matters after all? My personal relation to God matters. That takes priority over everything else”. Then a few paragraphs later and at the end of the chapter he states the following: “A few other things matter to be sure, but they begin there, go out from there and return there again. They are that we trust Christ completely, carry our cross daily, love God and our fellow men, walk in the light as God gives us to understand it; that we love mercy, and walk uprightly; that we fulfill our commission as ambassadors of Christ among men; that we grow in grace and in the knowledge of God and come at last to our end like a ripe shock of corn at harvest time.”
Having written this and having looked back a bit to history of your dad, your grandfather George , and even Dr. Kempton ---all of whom were very passionate, I am always trying to find the basics as to what to look for that really matters to keep our passion directed properly. God was so very concerned with the nation of Israel so in Deut. 17 he gives some very important rules to follow for the kings who would one day rule and lead and guide the nation. Both David and Solomon were passionate men. David was not a perfect man but was a man after God’s own heart and we would certainly place him among the noble. Solomon on the other hand was a man of great intellect, who flew above the radar yet was a colossal failure. God is passionate about the “church” as well and you and I are part of that and my prayer is that we both spend the rest of our lives on “ the few things that matter”.
I will close with this: Tozer’s very next chapter is one that I am finding challenging for the title is “The value of a sanctified imagination”. All this to say, the butterflies will no doubt have to keep flying around for a while longer before Rev. Dad brings the plane down to a landing—safe or not too safe. Love you daughter.
Dad

James 1

Dad,  your comments about James 1 have been turning over and over in my head all day, especially during the car ride to and from Grace's dance classes.  I hesitated to respond at first because I didn't want to seem like I was entering into a debate, but as I thought through what was bothering me about it all I felt the Lord encouraging me to write you about it.  I think it may shed some light on the great shift in my way of understanding the idea of "discernment." I'm not trying to convince you of anything, I'm not even sure in what ways you would disagree, but I am trying to explain how I understand this passage in a different light.
Here is what you wrote, "...James chapter one does give us some help. We are to go to His Word in humility, in the fear of God and with a pure heart (that is not always easy since the heart is deceitful and desperately wicked according to the prophet Jeremiah) and pray, and trust, and believe and have a quiet trust that He will keep that (hedge) “protecting”.
This is what I understand you to have meant by what you said: 
1. When we are seeking help in understanding we should go to the Scriptures.
2. Our attitude should be characterized by humility--acknowledging  that we know less than God, fear of God--a reverence and submission to Him, and a pure heart--to want what God wants.
3. I also understand you to mean (by quoting Jeremiah) that our interpretations of what we receive from Scripture or sense from God are often suspect because of the deceitfulness of our hearts, and thus we have to be aware that they cannot be fully trusted. 
4. Then you say we are to pray, (I would understand that to mean ask for wisdom) and trust and believe, (I understand you to mean that we should believe that God is in control of the situation and trust in His goodness and faithfulness to us.)
Did I understand you correctly? If not, please feel free to clarify. 
Now that I have told you what I understood you to mean, let me say that I don't disagree that those things are true and important. 
However, I don't believe that is what James is getting at in Chapter 1, especially verses 5-8.  (Though in verses 22-27 I find more that would allude to this if you interpret "word" to refer to Scripture as opposed to "truth" or "Jesus".) 
The reason this is so important to me is that I believe there is something else, and something different that verses 5-8 are referring to.  I believe that it is an incredibly important gift that we have been given and is useful to us especially in times of trial and testing. This gift of access to the Father plays an enormous part in how I live out my faith and my life.  I thought it might be helpful to you if I explained how I understand this, and how it affects what I believe and how I interact with God. 
Here is a quick summary of the passage:
What James actually says in verse 5 is that "if any of you is lacking in wisdom," we should "ask God." James is referring to the Person of God here, not His Scriptures.
Not only are we to ask God, but we are assured by James that if we do ask God for wisdom, God will give it to all who ask Him.  On top of that we are warned not to doubt what God gives us...in fact if we do doubt--that God gives wisdom and that we can receive it--then we can no longer expect Him to give it to us. 
I find myself shaking my head as I read this passage.  It is such a simple, yet profoundly wonderful teaching.  When you need wisdom, ask God.  He'll give it to you.  And don't doubt it or you'll just become a seesaw, a wave, someone who is unstable.  Why would God keep telling you stuff if you don't believe Him when He does?
But isn't it amazing how all the voices in my head tell me I should feel ashamed for taking that SCRIPTURE at face value? They say,"You can't possibly trust God to give you an answer.  You can't let yourself trust it if He does.  Come on, don't you know you are too prone to deceit to receive such an answer directly from God unmediated by the Scriptures?  Why would God speak to you directly when He's already told you everything you need to know in the Bible?"
Hmmmm.  But that is not what James 1:5-8 says. 
It took me years to allow myself to believe this truth even as I was experiencing it  in my interactions with the Lord.  In other words, I experienced that when I asked God for wisdom about something, He gave it to me.  But then I felt ashamed to admit that I trusted it.  Other people would tell me I couldn't trust it either. Then doubt, fear, and shame would enter in, and soon enough the wisdom He'd given me was covered in muck. 
I do actually believe that our hearts can get in the way of wisdom (as Jeremiah says), and so let me say a word about this.  (I will admit up front that I can't give you a rock solid theological argument on this one.) It has become my belief through my understanding of certain scriptures (I Cor. 2:6-16 would be a very important passage here), as well as my experience, that the Spirit of God can and does speak to our spirit.  I believe that this speaking--Spirit to spirit--is protected from evil on the outside, and even from the evil in our own hearts.  It is more powerful and it is pure in it's delivery.  In other words, the Spirit of God can reveal truth to my spirit that can be opposed to the desire of my heart.  He may tell me to risk when my heart tells me to protect itself.  The Spirit of God can reveal truth to my heart that may not make sense to my mind.  He may communicate things to my spirit that I may not comprehend on a conscious level for some time.  I think the Scriptures describe times Jesus did this often with the disciples.   
The reason I think this is so important to understand is two-fold: 
First, there are many difficulties we deal with in life that are not specifically addressed in Scripture.  We need God's guidance in them.  The other day I was disturbed because I didn't understand what was going on in the life of a friend and what this time was about for that person and for me as well.  I was driving, and I literally said to God, "Can we talk about this?  And by "talk" I mean, could You do most of the talking?"  "Can you help me understand what this time is about for this person, and what this time is about for me?"  And the Lord spoke into my spirit very quietly like the Shepherd does and said, "This person is going through something very significant right now."  My sense was, don't fret, and don't be nosy, just know that something important is going to come from this.  And peace came with a sense of release from confusion.  That was all the Lord felt I needed to know.  When I asked the Lord what this time was about for me, He gave me a very specific word.  He said, "This is what I am doing in your life right now."  It wasn't a word I would have thought of, but as I began to think through various pieces of my life, that word made a lot of sense as to what was being accomplished in them.  Again, I had clarity and peace.  Neither one of those answers gave me an insight that was contrary to my understanding of the truth Scripture, but neither answer was something I would have found specifically in Scripture. 
The second reason that I believe it is valuable and important to ask God for wisdom and to listen to what He says is that we often confuse our understanding of Scripture with the Truth of Scripture.  Asking God for wisdom can help us to understand a truth that may go against our interpretation of a particular passage, (or our theology at large) and help us to come to a different way of understanding God's truth in Scripture.  I've read several authors say something along these lines, so it is certainly not an original thought but it is an important one: perhaps the only error as grave as trying to understand the Spirit of God without the truth of Scriptures is to try to understand the Scriptures without the Spirit of God. 
There are times when I hear the Lord speak things to me that seem to go against my theology.  This is always disconcerting and calls me to my knees in prayer (James 1) and also back to the Scriptures.  I am admittedly asking the Spirit to reinform my understanding of the Word.  This might raise a lot of red flags to some, but I find it to actually be a more honest way of approaching an understanding of the Word of God.  I usually come away with a broader understanding of truth, or sometimes it's a picture that becomes richer or an understanding that I feel God beginning to open up to me. 
I remember once I was reading Psalm 27 in the NLT, and there is a beautiful expression of the Psalmist that calls to the Lord to come and talk to him.  I experienced a vision at this moment of a picture of a woman (me) kneeling before her husband in submission, and the Lord gave me an understanding of the power inherent in submission to bring her husband's covering over her. I can only describe it by saying that as she bowed at his feet, he was irresistibly drawn over her.  There was so much dignity in it all.  The power of her submission was as significant as the power of his covering.  It was such a beautiful opening of a truth and an indescribably tender teaching about submission and covering that I wept.  But I was confused because I was uncomfortable with the idea of seeing the Lord in the same light that a woman might see her husband.  Wasn't that idolatry?  I prayed, and said, "Lord if this vision is of You, I need you to help me to understand more about this truth within the context of Scripture."  In the course of my regular reading that week, I came upon Ephesians 5:22 "Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord."  The rest of the Ephesians passage fully supported what I had seen in my vision, but my vision informed my understanding of those passages in ways I never would have seen and that I might have read with a sense of reluctance because I didn't see it through the eyes of the Spirit in all it's beauty and power. 
Here is my confession, I only came to trust that God would respond to my request for wisdom when I asked Him because I was desperate enough to try it.  I had exhausted all other means of trying to understand what was happening to me.  My guess is, most skeptics, afraid of the dangers of heresy and confusion they see as inherent in this way of approaching God, haven't been truly willing enter into this, and so they haven't experienced it.  That was certainly true of me. My encouragement to them would simply be this, try it.  With a open mind, heart, and spirit.  
OK Dad, so this is incredibly detailed and I know it's loaded with all sorts of things you might feel are theological landmines. Feel free to respond if you want, Dad.  I'm guessing you might have some good things to add or questions that would be helpful.  But if you just want to mull it over that's fine too.  I just wanted to express that this is really important to me, and I wanted to explain why.

Little Daniel

May 12, 2010

I write with my second cup of coffee at my side at 6:12 in the morning. I have first been assigned to tell you a significant story. I will do that shortly. I have just finished reading James chapter 1 from two translations. The New American Standard and then from The Message. Becky, you might find it interesting that (of all passages) tonight your dad will be speaking on a passage of scripture that today has become the most controversial in all of the Bible. It is 1 Timothy chapter 2 and I need to speak on women and their roll in the church. A subject probably most debated for the past 20 years or so. But you and I are in a dialogue and not a debate so I will begin this little communication by telling a story. It is rather lengthy and Becky, you and I will probably come back to this from time to time over the next few months no doubt. I do consider this a significant conversation between father and daughter and hopefully it can be helpful to anyone else listening in.
Becky, you were just a little girl living in Belo Horizonte, Brazil when you were no doubt listening to a story I was telling from the pulpit. I told this story of Antonio and wife Selma, daughter Rosalva and their youngest son named Daniel. Antonio was a true brother in the Lord through conversion earlier on. His wife Selma was not. Antonio was attending the church in Cristina, where we worked when we first arrived in Belo Horizonte alongside co-workers Lee and Barb Thompson.
I was teaching through the book of Daniel. Antonio invited his wife Selma to this study and I noticed that she was sort of “glued” to her seat and very, very interested yet very quiet. I had no idea what was going on in her life. However, she was “gifted”. I found this out later. Months later.
While in my home office one morning Antonio was deeply distressed about something and asked if he could share something with me concerning a serious family problem. I sat and listened. He said, "Pastor, my wife Selma has been having these premonitions of bad things happening to significant family members. She saw that a relative was going to die in a car accident and then it happened. Then she saw that one of her close relatives would have a baby and it would die, and that also happened.
Antonio was convinced that she had this gift but it became even more disconcerting that day. For that day Selma told him that she had a premonition of their little Daniel being hit with a truck and being killed. Little Daniel was probably about 3 or 4 years old then and full of life and vigor. Not the easiest child to always keep your eyes on. What three year old is—right? Well, being new to the missionary field even though I was about 40 years old, I did what one usually does when faced with something very difficult. I prayed and counseled Antonio to pray for Daniel’s safety and for Selma to keep a close watch over Daniel. "We'll pray, and be responsible as much as possible and leave the rest up to God. Does He not have a hedge around “His”!!!!" (This is something I came by while serving in Viet Nam before ever becoming a missionary, incidentally.)
Well, not too long after that conversation, maybe two or three months later, Antonio’s wife Selma came to our house to have one of those serious conversations with me. She had tears in her eyes as she was distressed and didn’t know what to do next. She related that she was fearful of telling her husband what had happened just that past week. What was she to do? She then told me what had just recently happened as she was grocery shopping with her daughter Rosalva and her little son Daniel. While checking out all her purchases and while getting ready to pay, little Daniel ran out of the store and headed for the street. Selma yelled for her daughter to stop him but was unsuccessful. Selma dropped everything and started running too. Just at that time a light up on the hill turned green and a loaded VW van began its decent as Daniel began crossing the street. Selma screamed. The bus hit its breaks. The VW bus came to a screeching stop. Selma stands momentarily paralyzed watching. Daniel is barely spared. Not a scratch on him. Selma was fearful of telling Antonio what had happened for he would no doubt be angry at her for not looking properly after Daniel. What should she do?
Well, I did counsel Selma. Daniel is a healthy young man now. Selma and Antonio are too the last I heard.
This is the story Becky wanted me to share with you from one of many experiences God has privileged me to have. Yes, they do have theological implications. I am not a master of theology yet James chapter one does give us some help. We are to go to His Word in humility, in the fear of God and with a pure heart (that is not always easy since the heart is deceitful and desperately wicked according to the prophet Jeremiah) and pray, and trust, and believe and have a quiet trust that He will keep that (hedge) “protecting”.
That is it for today. This finishes dad’s first two assignments from my only precious daughter. One day we just might get to the butterflies.
More coming in God’s good time. Maybe even tomorrow or later on in the week.
Love,
Rev. Dad.

Apples for Two

It is Mother's Day today and with a cup of coffee at my desk I will just chat with you while you are no doubt fast asleep with your family there in Pennsylvania. I want you to know daughter, that before I could sit down and write to you, I first read from Proverbs 31 and then wrote a letter to your mom about how she has "out-parented me by leaps and bounds". We both know that is the truth and nothing but the truth. It just so happens that she couldn't bike up those big hills behind your house where the apple orchards are located. Otherwise, she would be telling you this little story.
In the picture you will notice Sarah getting ready for our little "outing". My how times have changed. Look at that little trailer behind the bike. When you were a little girl growing up in Mantua, New Jersey, your dad would take you and your brother for bike rides. Randy sat in a seat on the back and you in the wagon behind and off we went to investigate the neighborhood wildlife. I can't remember any apple orchards along the way and maybe that was a good thing. It kept us out of trouble. There were plenty of geese however and that was problematic from time to time. It was difficult to keep you in the wagon. You were not the most behaved as I recall.
Well now, with the modern version of the wagon, Sarah and I were off for our outing on a beautiful autumn day. Sarah had juice, a few snacks,and off we went. She loves going on these rides in the neighborhood and I think her mother even more, especially when grandpa is around.
The rides of course take us up hills and some of them are rather steep. Especially those that lead to the apple orchards. Well, first it was a ride to the cows. About 200 hundred of them about two miles out. She of course wanted to get out of the wagon to greet them. They ran off, she said, "Good bye cows," and we were back on the road. Then she wanted to investigate what was up on the top of this big hill. So, I had to dismount two thirds of the way and huffed and puffed my way to the very top. Then we were in apple orchard heaven. The trees were full and by this time she and I were just wandering.
We were like Adam and Eve in the garden. There were no fences, but in the USA that doesn't matter. You are still prohibited to enter and take. Not necessarily the case here in Brazil. There would not only be fences but probably someone guarding the orchard with all the security equipment at his disposal.
Well, by this time we were on a slight downhill and I look back and Sarah had her eyes on the apples and deep down I was looking at them with envy as well. Only, I had "wisdom" and she has nothing but the "sin nature" fully in gear.  Fortunately, I saw up ahead an apple orchard picker who was working this tree right
near the side of the road. I slowed to a crawl. He looked, and saw nothing but a starved child. Thank God for the way children communicate without words. Sometimes a look is worth a thousand words. That was the case here.
The apple picker said (not to me but to Sarah) "how would you like an apple"? Without waiting for a response he picked two. One for me and one for Sarah. He handed them both to me and wished me a good afternoon and he was back to picking. Well, I now had one very big juicy looking red apple in my right hand and one rather small juicy red in my other. Now, I just knew that apple picker's mind when he picked the big one and the small one. He certainly picked that big one for me and the little one for little Sarah.  So, like a good grandpa, I handed her that little one because of course it would fit into her little hands almost perfectly. Sarah didn't see things that way at all. She knew the big one was for her and the little one for me.
Well, we got that straight right away and we were off again on the most enjoyable part of the trip. We were now coasting, talking between bites.
The greatest conversations that grandpa's have no way of communicating.
Let's just say, Sarah was talking, chewing, and singing her way back home, coasting down the hill and a picture is worth a thousand words.
Happy Mother's Day Becky and thanks for sharing Sarah with us and Emily and Grace, too.
Love you!
Dad

It's a Start

So I've asked my Dad to write with me.  He's a little insecure about this, certainly not because He's afraid to speak his mind, more because he's reluctant to write it.  So we'll see how this goes...mostly I'll probably post his entries for him, though I promise not to edit content (no matter how much I am tempted!) Hopefully he can learn soon how to navigate the blogging world on his own.
:-)
Maybe he'll get the hang of blogging and just take over.  Won't that be fun.
If you want to know a little bit more of what prompted me to ask him to do this, you have to read my comments under The Butterflies and that should explain. 
My intent is not to debate, though that may happen from time to time, rather it is to share our dialogue.  We welcome comments that are offered the spirit of dialogue and honest searching, though I do not promise answers or explanations.  And yes, I will, with my Dad, moderate them, especially if they draw away from the dialogue rather than enhance it.
I also wanted very much to encourage my Dad to put some of his stories in print.  I started to do some of that, and lost them.  So hopefully I can get him to use this as a means to do so.  His stories do not all directly relate to mine, but they certainly have helped to shape me.  
The first writing assignment I gave to my Dad was to tell his story of Sarah and the Apples.  I know you are all waiting with bated breath, so I'll tell him to step on it.  This hopefully will give me time to put some thoughts in writing about our butterfly dialogue.